You've been sitting on the couch or in front of your computer for months, eating bag after bag of nacho-flavored tortilla chips, and washing it down with 2-litre bottles of generic cola. You can't remember the last time you exercised (and no, jogging your memory doesn't count), and suddenly, your pants and t-shirts no longer fit. Why is it that you can now rest your dinner plate on your chest?

Well, my friend, you have a serious case of man boobs!

Now what are you going to do about this situation now that you and your wife can both shop for support undergarments in the same aisle at Wal-Mart? If you ever saw any of your friends face-to-face, you're certain that they would have something to say about your new upper-body pride, and those comments aren't going to be complimentary.

Well, you have a couple of options, both which include cutting back on the serious snack food consumption. One is that you unplug the TV set, and unhook yourself from the Internet for a while and go hit the gym. You and your man boobs can start off slowly on a treadmill or a recumbent bicycle, and start to work on your cardio, while still burning off some of your excess fat (ie. from your man boobs).

The other option is a little bit more serious, and involves you seeing a doctor or specialist about male breast reduction. Yes, the thought of having male plastic surgery might sound a little frightening, but the alternatives (ie. death) aren't too rosy, if you can't see yourself and your man boobs living to a ripe old age.

So, do you yourself a favour, today, and put the cap back on that cola bottle, throw the chips in the garbage, go downstairs and fetch yourself an apple and a bowl of carrots, and have a nice long discussion with your man boobs, and politely explain to them why they are no longer going to be welcome on your chest.